I woke up on 1st of January, 2011. The head was a bit hung up in the morning cause of the late night party i had with my friends(before you start thinking something else, it was strictly no booze). We danced like mad that night and played cards and slept in the wee hours and then i had to get up early in the morning cause i was "working" that day. Yea, it sucks working on Jan 1st...
The pain in my head didn't let me work for the most part of the day, so there in my office cabin, i just did what I am best at, pretended to work.At night i sat at the edge of bed near the window, the moonlight washed my floor. I stared at the moon. Both of us were sleepless. It always accompanied me on those sleepless nights of mine. And we understand each other's silence completely.
Suddenly this urge came. I picked up my diary and started writing..anything and everything that came to my mind. It took me to a flashback.
To the day when i was enjoying new year's eve with my sis and a friend. We partied that day too, went out, ordered pizza, cut a cake.
I didn't know what was in store for me in the year. Now I do. Now that I have been there, done that.
I always believe, at the cost of sounding stupid, that what we do on the first day of the year, we do throughout the year. Well, it turned out it was true in my case. :)
I worked on the first day of the year and I kept working throughout the year. I fought with one of my best friend and we have never quite bounced back since. The health was not so good and I had a minor surgery. I got through a decent MBA college and didn't join.
Quite a handful happened throughtout the year. In one word, it was TAXING, exhaustive, and drained me physically, emotionally, psychologically in my personal as well as professional life.
If I look at it in one way, then may be everything happened for good. That if I worked so hard professionally, then it is gonna be a paving way for my career. If I had a surgery then it is going to help me in the long run. If the relation with my best friend did not smoothen, then it is best we are apart cause may be in future it may have caused bitterness in relations and we would have become intolerable for each other. If I didn't join that college, then may be I am meant for something better. Hence whatever happened was for the best and was perfect.
But if I see on the other hand, then may be, that if I worked soooo hard, I lost on so many things in the process, the things that i overlooked and will never come back. What if I die tomorrow?? I am not gonna count the number of days I worked but the days I was there with people I loved, the days I did the things that made me and my people happy.
Also may be I had this surgery and it was not a good thing to do at such an early age. And may be that I lost my best friend and noone can replace the person. And that I will keep missing "us" for the rest of my life.
May be this MBA college was my last chance of getting into a college and after this I won't get a better chance at a better college.
Hence whatever happened has changed the course of my life and who knows, not for good at all!
So 2010 was either a terrific year for me or the worst that could ever be. It is just how I look at it and also how it turns out to be in the long run. Cause time is the only solution to everything. But what I know is that by the time Dec 31st 2010 came, I wanted the year to be over and out as soon as possible. I did not have any more courage to take things, rather bear things. It wasn't an easy year. Life is sooo weird at times and so perfect at the other..Ces't la vie!
"Memory is a wonderful thing if you don't have to deal with the past."
I just wanna have wonderful memories. Will have to leave the past behind for that in the last year.
No baggage of the past should be carried this year. I need to be revitalized for all the unpredictability life holds in 2011. Till then Peace out!!! (Y)
